Well, I think all those quotes I just posted were to serve myself for this week and the weeks ahead. I am struggling with some pretty big anxiety. Yesterday our health insurance ran out. We don't qualify for the state programs anymore. But the insurance through the temp. agency that Mike is working with doesn't meet the "state's requirements". I was told that a letter would be mailed today and we have to wait until they investigate our insurance options.
And although today I woke up completely healthy, I feel like a safety net has been ripped away. My crazy thoughts go like this: What if Mike gets into a big car accident on the way home today? We have no insurance. We won't be able to pay for it. We'll lose all our savings and become bankrupt! And on and on. Can you relate?
On Mother's Day our pastor preached on Psalms 27. David is afraid of men who are out to kill him (at least I don't have that issue) and he finds his comfort in God... "One thing I have asked from the LORD, that I shall seek: That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the LORD" (vs.4). Two of the main points really hit home:
1. Is communing with God your #1 priority? Or is it just asking Him to come down and fix your mess so you can be at ease?
2. When uncertainty comes, it reveals to us what our functional God is. We can say all the Bible verses we want and can say that we trust in God.. but do we really when something happens? Or do we look to other things for comfort... food, TV, spouse, etc?
So as I wait for this letter and this investigation, I will fight my sinful desires (by the grace of God) to worry and be anxious and run to the cross for hope. And meditate on the last verses of Psalm 27:
" I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; yes, wait for the Lord".
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3 comments:
Thanks for posting this, what a great reminder. I also love that verse... "Wait for the Lord".
Praying for you, But how comforting to know that it is God who is our provider.
ok, so i'm going to use Megan's blog AND your blog with my devotions now. YAY! Anxiety is a big issue with me, too. I'll have to tell you more about it sometime :) see you when we get back!
As I have learned lately in my pathetic lack of faith in such a Mighty God......with God ALL things are possible even those things we think (in our finite minds)are too big!!
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